Acting - Part 1                                         December 6, 2002

I've always known what I've wanted to be. At the end of this summer I started considering other options though. It was kind of scary to have doubts about something you were so sure of. All my doubts have vanished though. I am definitely going to be an actress.

Tonight was my first big debut. I've graduated from little school plays, and I landed a part in the EWC (Eastern Wyoming College) Christmas play. This performance was the first performance to be brought by the Goshen County Community Theatre, and we did "It's a Wonderful Life". And you wanna know what? It truly is a wonderful life.

Lots of people think that I'm crazy. They think that I'll never be an actress because it's just a "hobby".  A hobby my foot. These people will never understand the overwhelming sensation of being on stage. They'll never understand the exhilaration that you feel when you deliver your first line. They'll never understand that acting isn't something to do... acting is something that a few people are BORN to do.

I believe that I am one of these people.

Tonight, before the big debut, I was unexpectedly calm. I knew my lines. I don't get stage-fright. For me, everything was perfect. Now I'm on an emotional high that I just can't explain. My performance was good (according to other people), and when my music teacher ( one of my favorite teachers, and someone who does a lot of theater, and who is one of my role models) told me that she was proud of me, I was soaring. And when my mother gave me flowers, I knew that the feeling I had would be one of the best things I would ever experience.

There was one teeny-eeny pitfall this evening. Nick (the man who played George Bailey) forgot to say the the end of his line. My line depended on that forgotten sentence. I quietly mouthed him the words... no one in the audience noticed, and once again, things were going great for me. I delivered my next line and the audience saw me for what my character was... a dirty-rotten old bag who would stop at nothing to get what she wanted. I loved it. Okay, so, that sounds strange that I love the fact that people think I'm a mean person, but if I've convinced them that my character is horrible, then I've achieved what I wanted to do. And that's what makes me an actress. I'm on cloud nine; I hope this feeling will never go away. Of course... I know that it WILL go away eventually, but for the moment I'm relishing in it.

And just think, I still have three more performances to give! And in the spring, I'm taking on a musical!